Thursday, May 17, 2012

Men are not dogs

Men are like dogs.

I've always know dogs to be very loving, loyal creatures that never leave your side. I think that's why I've never really understood this phrase as an insult to men before.

My first family dog that I can remember was a Dalmatian that I myself received as a Christmas present in 1995. Her name was Chambray (because of her Chambray blue eyes) and she came in her own special Christmas box. If you know anything about Dalmatians, it should be that they are crazy. But Chammy (that's what we called her) was in a category by herself. She was bat-shit crazy. She ate socks, lipstick, crayons, trampolines, shoes, rocks, human hands, anything she could get her teeth on. One night, soon after we had gotten her, I was sitting on the ground watching tv and she kept nudging me to play. I kept pushing her away and then she started coming at me with her teeth. (Now keep in mind that I was only four and didn't really know that dogs were not, infact, capable of speaking, unlike what I had learned from a popular Disney movie that had come out recently before this time.) I was sick of her biting me all the time! So what I decided to do to, you know, teach her a lesson was to grab her tail in both of my hands and bite it. Yes, I bit a dog's tail, okay? She kept biting me first! (And yes, I did get in trouble by my parents.) But you know what's crazy, she still loved the shit out of me after that. She was the best dog ever. She protected our home from all intruders. Even attacked a couple. And as she got older, she would watch over my sisters and I like we were her own. She loved all five members of our family harder and greater than anything in this world. And when our family had to put her down in June of 2009, it was like we truly had lost one of the leaders of this pack. We loved her like she loved us. And after she turned 13, and her physical capabilities started to decline, we tried our damnedest to save her because she was our guardian angel, our protector. But unfortunately, like all every living thing in this world, death had to come for her. And to this day, we all miss her so much.

In 2002, my family got our first small dog ever. She was a little black Shih-tzu that we named Coco. Now, we got Coco for my little sister Chelsea and we chose that breed because we heard that they don't shed and they don't bark much. And sure, they don't shed. But Coco hasn't stopped barking for almost 10 years. And her and I don't have the best relationship. When ever I touch her, she growls. Except when it's just me and her. When we are alone, she thinks I hung the damn moon! She cuddles with me, licks my face, plays with me, the whole enchilada! But as soon as some one else walks into the house, it's like I shot her mother and she is now seeking revenge. But I still know she loves me. We just have a special relationship. And I know that her loyalty runs just as think as Chammy's did, she just shows it differently.

In 2008, after my family made the trek from Wisconsin to California, we got another Shih-tzu. A white one that we named Chloe. Chloe is probably the sweetest dog you will ever meet. She will always make an effort to say hi, roll over for a belly rub, lick your face, and just be on top of you all the time. And she is so damn cute. She has these big brown eyes that melt your heart and such an energetic spirit. She loves everyone, and everything. Especially her tennis balls. She always has one in her mouth. She doesn't bark as much as Coco does, and thank you Baby Jesus for that!

In the summer of 2007, my older sister adopted a dog from a pound in Crenshaw, CA. She is this medium sized orange thing with matching eyes, a long tail, and huge pointy ears and her name is Colbie Sue. We don't know much about her past, but we know a couple of things: she doesn't like men of color and she doesn't like black trash bags. And it takes her a very long time to warm up to someone, but as soon as she likes you, she loves you forever. She loves my sister so much, it's disgusting. Also, she is a very strange dog. There is nothing she enjoys more than for a human to rub her chest with their foot (like seriously, what the hell?). Colbie and Chammy didn't spend much time together, but I know that if Chammy would have been younger, they would have been inseparable. They truly are kindred spirits. Two of the most loyal dogs ever.

Now, we have one more member to our pack. Two weeks ago, I got a little puppy for myself: a little fawn pug that I named Clementine. Now, I have never had a dog that I took care of myself before, so I never really realized how loyal they are to the hand that feeds them. It's been two weeks, and Clementine is clearly mine. Which is awesome, but I haven't figured out much about her personality other than she loves to chew on computers, hair, couches, and buttons, has a little bit of a gas problem, and she is practically a dog version of Albert Einstein. She is 10 weeks old and is almost potty trained, and knows where her food and treats are kept. That might not seem like much, but I was not expecting this level of genius right away! And she is too freaking cute!

This is her. Isn't she like the most adorable?! I love my Clementine :)

But what I am getting at here isn't how awesome dogs are, but how the relation between men and dogs doesn't make sense! Dogs love and are the most loyal creatures. And in my own experience, other than my father, men just get up and leave. They don't seem to care much about your feelings or your needs. They just want to be entertained. And when they get bored, they drop you and leave. Maybe I just haven't found the proper kind of love yet, or maybe I just haven't gotten over the most serious relationship that I have ever been in that ended two months ago. And I hope those are the real reasons why I feel this way, because I don't want to be bitter. I just don't see this phrase as something that could possibly be negative.

I know that I just haven't found the right person yet, and I have plenty of time to still do that because I am only 21 years old. But I think that for now, I'm just going to keep hanging out with dogs.

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